Questions to ask before marriage

  • Why are we getting married?
  • What do we (as a couple) want out of life?
  • Do you think our relationship will change after we are married?
  • What do you think we’ll be doing in thirty or forty years?
  • Do you think it is important to be faithful to one another?
  • Do you think it is important to to be honest with one another?
  • What values do you want to bring from your family into our marriage?
  • What do you like and dislike about your family?
  • What do you like and dislike about my family?
  • What do you like and dislike about your parents’ marriage?
  • LOL! What do you like and dislike about my parents’ marriage?
  • How would you describe yourself?
  • How do you think I see you?
  • Do I have trust issues or feel insecure?
  • Am I a jealous person?
  • How important is affirmation to me?
  • Do I handle compliments well?
  • What is your love language?
  • Do you think we listen to one another well?
  • What are your expectations about how we will spend our free time?
  • Do you believe that we should be doing everything together?
  • Can we each pursue our own interests?
  • Do you need time alone?
  • How would you feel if I want a night out with my friends now and then?
  • How will we make sure we have quality time together?


  • Can we talk about money?
  • Are you a saver or spender when it comes to money?
  • How much do we owe in debts and what are our assets?
  • Do you want to have a budget?
  • Where does our money go?
  • Should we have a joint checking account or separate accounts or both?
  • Who is going to be responsible for making sure that bills are paid on time?
  • Do you consider going to the movies and having a vacation every year a necessity or a luxury?
  • What are our financial goals?
  • Do you have any outstanding fines or debts?
  • What are our future plans for purchasing a home?
  • Do we both know where our important financial documents are located?
  • What is the most important thing that money can do for you?
  • Who had control of the money when you were growing up?
  • How did you learn what it meant to be a man/woman?

Children, Birth Control, & Parenting

  • Do you want to have children?
  • Do we want to have children?
  • If we decide we do want children, how many children do you want to have?
  • How long should we be married before having children?
  • How do you feel about having children (or more children)?
  • What kind of parent do you think you will be?
  • What is your parenting philosophy?
  • Will one of us stay home after we have children?
  • What type of birth control should we use if we want to postpone or prevent parenthood?
  • How do you feel about adoption?
  • What are your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings about abortions?
  • Do you have any children already?
  • Does religion play an important part in your life?
  • Do you think faith and spirituality are important in a marriage?
  • What is your image of God?
  • Do you believe in God?
  • Can you tell me what makes up your belief systems?

Sex & Kinky

  • Can we talk about sex?
  • Should we talk about sex?
  • Are you comfortable discussing your sexual likes and dislikes?
  • What are your expectations of our sexual relationship?
  • If I don’t say so, how do you know that I want to make love?
  • How will we make decisions together?
  • Are we both willing to face into difficult areas or do we try to avoid conflict?
  • Do you think we have problems in our relationship that we need to deal with before our wedding?
  • Do we handle conflict well?
  • How are we different?
  • Do you think our differences will create problems in our marriage?
  • Do you expect or want me to change?
  • Can we both forgive?
  • Are we both willing to work on our communication skills and to share intimately with each other?
  • Do you have sexual dreams? Tell me about some of them.

Childhood and Unforgettable Memories

  • What were your hobbies when you were a kid?
  • What was your childhood ambition?
  • Who was the first person who died in your life? How did you feel about it?
  • Was there a movie that made you cry? Which one?
  • How old were you the first time you thought you were in love?
  • What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done in your life?
  • What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever done in your life?
  • How old were you when you had your first kiss?
  • Did you parents tell you about sex, or did you already know?
  • When you were a child, did you ever experiment sexually with another child?
  • Were you ever sexually, emotionally, or verbally abused?

Influences & Friendships

  • Who‘s the person you admire the most?
  • Who helped you figure out how to ask someone out on your first date?
  • What is the best relationship advice someone has ever given you?
  • If your friend was cheating on their spouse, do you think you should tell their partner?
  • If your friend was cheating on their spouse, would you tell your spouse about it?


  • What were our first words to one another?
  • What was your first impression of me?
  • What was the first thing that attracted you about me?
  • What’s your favorite memory of me?
  • What’s your favorite way of spending time with me?
  • The first time I asked you out, did it cross your mind to refuse my invitation?
  • Have you had second thoughts about asking me out the first time?
  • Right before we kissed the first time, what were you thinking?
  • Do you think that physical attributes are more important to maintaining a successful relationship or do you think that friendship maintains a relationship?
  • How do you describe me to other people?
  • Was there anything that you were worried about the first time we were about to become naked?
  • What is the one thing that I do that makes you crazy?
  • Tell me when you first knew you loved me?
  • What is cheating?

Fantasies and Secret Wishes

  • If you’ve got only one day to live, how would you like to spend it?
  • If you could have 3 wishes, what would they be?
  • Assuming you can afford anything, what would be the most important for you to accomplish?
  • If you were to give money to charity, which organization would you choose? Why?
  • If you could relive any one day from your childhood, which day would it be?
  • If you were to give yourself a nickname, what would it be?
  • If you were to give me a nickname, what would it be?
  • Which celebrity do you fantasize about?
  • If our life story will be made into a movie, what genre would it be? Who’ll play your part and mine?
  • If money were no object, what is the one thing that would be most important to you to do?
  • Do you masturbate?
  • When you look at a woman, what is the first thing you notice?
  • What animals do you like and not like?
  • Describe your perfect dream date.
  • Describe your perfect wedding.
  • What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker for you?
  • How important do you think monogamy is to a relationship?
  • Who do you believe is the dominant one in a relationship and why?
  • If you were really in trouble, who would you go to for advice?
  • Who do you feel responsible for in your life?
  • How do you handle anger? Has it ever caused a problem in your life?
  • What do you regret most?



About Me

Mom of 3, Sorta Wifey, Daughter, Mommy's Girl, Aspie Read more:

Posted on August 9, 2013, in Marriage, Relationship & Sex, Thoughts. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.


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